this term has pretty much flown by. one assignment after another, one presentation after another, reading and reading and reading every week. haha it just flies. is this how its gonna be from now? sitting at my desk, day after day, typing away furiously, or pulling my hair out at my assignments? having no time to do anything else, but still not being able to complete my work? night after night of restless tossing, subconscious still spinning with tasks to complete. waking up extremely early and lying in bed trying to fall back asleep. is this how its meant to be? i'll be an extremely old woman by the end of my four years then.
and im not even enjoying myself. i dont have to force myself to do work, coz nerves and stress does that for me already. but i have to force myself to get out of bed every morning, to sit down, to spend my day doing what i have to do and fantasizing about what i wanto do. is this the price for three months of freedom? is it supposed to be this way? whoever said uni was the best time of your life. should eat shit and die.
st nicks was the best time of my life. honestly. i didnt see it then, but looking back now, i can see how much i had then. life was so much easier. people were so much easier to get along with. we had so much more time to chill, talk, do lame things, and essentially, grow. nothing makes me laugh harder than the thought of the funny things we did then. the bonds we forged, the character we built. even the food was better, God damnnit. i miss those days.
we had less then. we didnt have a career path set for us, we didnt know where we were going to end up. we had less friends, no guys to worry about. no make up to hide under, no fancy clothes to make us feel secure. no big-name teachers, or super aesthetic school buildings. no crowd to make us feel small, no office to make us feel like we're just another number. we had so little, but we had so much. we had each other. we had the most loving environment ever. we had friends. we had teachers who cried for us. that was the best.
i wish i was peter pan.
a star fell from the sky;
10:48 PM